hey everyone, i am 18 and utterly lost. im so tired of watching my best friend cry because i cut. i cut words in my body. usually when they mean something. i have die bitch along my arm. if i was going to cut to kill myself it would be on my arm. worthless, pathetic, unlovable. disgusting and bitch are very common. i dont want to stop i just want to stop hurting my friends and family. when i couldnt cut i took a safety pin and used it to cut words on my skin. they take a while but you blled eventually. the other night i resorted to burning my arm. i guess when i zone out i scratch myself. it bleeds a lot. i dont even know how i can get so deep with my nails. i have been thinking about putting nails in my body with a hammer. i hate being twisted.